Notes from the Messy Middle
In which I attempt to eloquently describe my big move & preparing to travel long term
As I’m writing this, the house is sold, our shit stuff is put into storage, and we’re visiting friends and family in the Northeastern US before we head off on our extended travel adventures. Writing has been both easy and hard. I mean, how can I eloquently discuss the grief and excitement that’s coursing through my veins at this very minute?
The other day, I sat down for my daily-ish meditation and my mind was racing more than usual.
I mean, it’s not like I don’t have a bazillion events and decisions to make in the next two months:
Finalize kiddo’s schooling situation
Figure out health insurance and all that fun stuff while overseas
Finalize a loose travel itinerary
Establish some sort of routine and boundaries while all three of us are crammed together in AirBnbs/hotel rooms 24/7
See if there are any friends that will be in the same vicinity as us (if you live or are traveling in Europe September to mid-November hit me up!)
Hopefully finalize some more work contracts
Go apartment hunting/scope out neighborhoods we plan on settling in once our nomadic experiment is done
And if I’m to be totally honest, I miss our old house a little bit. Partially it’s because I crave my own room to work in. Part of it is I don’t feel like I have enough time to myself.
But with change comes both hellos and goodbyes, losses and gains. And it’s not my first time going through a massive change (I DO NOT recommend changing careers, becoming a new parent, and moving halfway across the world at the same time).
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I wanted our last two weeks before the big move to be a bit more relaxed. To be able to visit our favorite spots, meet up with friends and be able to appreciate the time we’ve been here.
It’s been a place where I grew my little mighty writing business and where my husband and I were able to save up for this little break.
It’s also been where I learned how to use my voice and put it towards efforts that were influential in passing a piece of legislation in Florida.
The reality has been quite different. The “stuff” took too long to organize. It got to the point where we have several boxes labeled "miscellaneous" and my organization-loving heart was crying inside.
The rain prevented us from doing any outside cleaning for the new homeowners, and the weeding and such got pushed back to days before we were to leave.
And in the middle of it all, I thought making cruffins (muffins using croissant dough) was a fantastic idea.
There were pockets of quiet contemplation, like staring at the birds at the local zoo and thanking the maintenance staff for putting in a roof over some of the pergolas where they normally poop.
I also loved digging through our book collection and finding some gems, and giggling at the most random of finds.
My favorite neighborhood ducks even came by for a farewell when I tried to clean the pool.
It goes without saying that aside from all the logistical questions that pop up, I’ve been thinking about what I really need and want in this season of my life.
The amount of questions that’s popped up on my daily walks has been staggering:
How much work is enough right now to sustain my basic needs, while giving me the space to be present during my travels?
How can I create more space in my days?
What can I do to mitigate FOMO at not visiting all the sites we all want to visit?
How can we manage our routines and day-to-day tasks so it feels like we’ve done “enough” for the day?
What can I do to feel like we continue to have enough money (we do!) even though our income is taking a temporary pause?
Of course, tackling these questions and all the logistical challenges is more than I can fit into this piece of writing. Over the next few weeks I plan on writing diary entries of sorts as I try to further uncouple work from self-worth, figure out a new way of interacting with money now that I have enough for what I need in this season in my life, and stay grounded during a time of massive change.
I hope you’ll join me!
Enjoy!
baking sweet treats is ALWAYS a good idea